If you’ve ever asked yourself “what does sex feel like?”, you are not alone.
Most people define sex as penis-in-vagina penetration but that’s just the tip of the iceberg. Oral sex, hand jobs, and anal sex count as well. They all feel different. Some feel more orgasmic than others.
It Feels Good
Whether you like to think of it as naughty, exciting or even life-changing, sex feels pretty good. It’s a natural high that bonds you with your partner and gives you spine-tingling orgasms (or at least, it should).
Of course, it depends on the situation for it to feel good, but when everything comes together in a perfect jigsaw puzzle, it can be downright mind-blowing. Besides the obvious physical sensations, it also entails a lot of emotional and sexual tension that gets released in a climax.
For some people, it takes a long time to orgasm, which is normal and not necessarily a sign of bad sex. You just have to take your time and get in the right mindset for it to work, explains sexologist Kassandra Mourikis.
It helps to have a regular time and spot for sex, so it becomes something you look forward to. This way, you don’t need to rely on external stimuli to get the job done and can focus on what makes you happy. That’s the key to making sex feel good — and the reason why it can be so addictive.
It Feels Naughty
There are many different ways to be naughty when having sex, and it can feel good for both partners. Some examples include kissing and stroking, oral sex, and nipple play. Embracing the naughty side of your relationship can strengthen your connection and build trust and intimacy.
Ultimately, it comes down to personal preferences and what each partner is comfortable with. It’s important to communicate with your partner about their needs and desires and always prioritize consent.
For example, some people may find it uncomfortable to have oral sex in public or to grab their partner’s penis in a public place. This is because it violates their sense of personal boundaries.
Other people, on the other hand, might find these activities thrilling. For them, sex feels naughty when it’s sexually adventurous and breaks norms or taboos. For instance, sex before marriage might feel naughty for Christians because it violates a societal rule. It also feels naughty for couples to have sex in a public bathroom or in a bedroom that’s visible to other people. This type of sex can be particularly intense and satisfying because it’s unexpected.
It Feels Exciting
Depending on the individual, sex can feel like all kinds of things. Despite the fact that many people are taught that sex only involves penis-in-vagina penetration, other sexual acts like oral sex, hand sex, outercourse and more can be just as exciting as p-in-v.
The most common feeling is excitement — a sensation that makes your heart rate increase and your muscles tighten, leading up to the third stage of sexual pleasure: orgasm. In this stage, your nipples get hard, and the clitoris for women or the penis for men firm up. It’s a time when your self-consciousness melts away and you are totally immersed in the experience.
The last phase is resolution, where the tension is released and your body returns to its pre-sex state. This is when you can enjoy the sexual act even more because your brain is flooded with happy chemicals that tell you everything in the world is awesome.
It Feels Natural
It’s normal to want to experience sex, but you don’t need to lose your virginity first. If you and your partner are open to it, sex can be an intensely intimate act that brings both of you pleasure and joy.
Sexual arousal is triggered by dopamine and serotonin, which is why so many people crave it. And when you’re in the midst of orgasm, you’re feeling happy and satisfied—a combination that makes it hard not to love sex.
Getting frisky can feel different for every person, too. For example, women’s orgasms can range from erotic to intensely intimate. Similarly, men’s feelings while having penetrative sex can run the sexy gambit, as reported by Metro.
That’s why it can be difficult to communicate what sex feels like to new partners. Even experienced partners have a hard time explaining what penetrative sex feels like to people who haven’t had it before, so it’s something you really have to experience yourself to understand. However, having an open conversation with your partner before sex can help you both communicate what you enjoy and don’t enjoy about it.
It Feels Mind-Blowing
The pleasure of sex is so intense that it can feel like you’re out of your mind. During the moment of climax or an orgasm, the outside world can disappear as you become totally absorbed in the feeling of your own body and your partner’s. This is a powerful and transcendent experience that many people say they crave.
Having sex can also bring out the best of who you are. It can be a way to explore naughty sides of your personality that you’d rather keep hidden and it can also be a way to share things about yourself with your lover that you might not otherwise talk about in the day-to-day. This can be a very intimate experience and a great way to connect with your partner on a deeper level, as described by 37-year-old Jasmine* from Brisbane.
Of course, not all sex feels good. There are people who don’t enjoy it and some might even get bored with it or find that it doesn’t satisfy them. For this reason, it’s important that you listen to your body and only have sex that makes you happy.
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