For some people, a sex toy is the perfect way to satiate fantasies. Whether it’s a cactus pad big enough for penetration or a fleshlight, there’s something out there for everyone.
An artificial vagina (also known as a stroker, masturbation aid or pocket pussy) is a type of masturbation aid designed to imitate a female sex organ.
1. Vegetables
There’s a reason porn stars love using their vegetables to masturbate: they’re tight, soft and feel good. But if you’re not ready to shell out for the real deal, a number of creative DIYers have come up with ingenious methods for making your own pocket pussy.
Many vegetables, including cucumbers, carrots and zucchini, have a natural structure that mimics the curve of your penis. They’re also cheap and easily available, although it’s important to note that “these items are covered with bacteria that your vagina may not be able to handle,” gynecologist Maureen Whelihan tells SELF. And they’re not always the most comfortable—especially if you’re thrusting them in and out of your rectum.
Another option is a cactus pad, which can be found at most any plant store or even in your backyard. Be sure to carefully remove the thorns before you use it, though. Then, simply prize open a section that’s big enough for your dick, then wrap the whole thing with bubble wrap or a plastic bag for added protection.
For an even more realistic experience, look for a vibrating artificial vagina that’s designed to simulate female genitalia—they usually come with a built-in sleeve where you can insert your cock and a hole on the bottom or end of the sleeve for a vibrating bullet. Some types of these artificial vaginas are made with ridges that replicate the rugae of a woman’s vulva. They’re popular in Japan, where they are known as onaholes, and often feature anime and hentai-themed packaging.
2. Sock Sucker
If you’re feeling horny but don’t want to drop a hundo on a bona fide Fleshlight, a DIY pocket pussy is your best bet. Fortunately, the internet has no shortage of ingenious methods for creating a mini-vagina that’ll answer nature’s call — and it probably won’t cost you more than a pack of socks.
The most basic way to create a pocket pussy is to stuff a water-based lube into a sock. It’s not as arousing as the more elaborate alternatives, but it gets the job done. And it’s pretty much foolproof.
Another easy, affordable way to make a pocket pussy is to use a pool noodle. Cut one end vertically, leaving a latex glove opening on the other side to trap your penis. Lube up and you’ll have a textured homemade love tunnel with knobs and ridges to titillate your cock like no other.
For a little extra gratification, you can even wrap the entire thing in banana peel. This will add a bit of friction to the pleasure and make for an all-around smoother sensation. The only downside is that the peel can leave a sour taste in your mouth, so it may not be a good idea to use this one for masturbation. However, it’s a great choice for sex with your partner.
3. Toilet Paper Sucker
There’s no need to spend money on a bona fide Fleshlight when you can use a plethora of homemade alternatives. Bubble wrap, for instance, is commonly recommended by masturbation websites as a DIY pocket pussy toy. It’s cheap, works pretty well, and can be used again.
Another option is a toilet paper roll. It’s easy to make and you can still use it afterwards. To do this, simply remove the cardboard tube from the center and threat a glove or condom through it. Then, stretch the end of the glove over one end of the toilet paper. Add lube and you’re good to go.
If you’re feeling creative, you can also use a bit of skin from your penis as a vagina substitute. Just grab a few loose bits of foreskin from both sides of your dick and wrap it around. Then, secure it with a bit of tape. You can even put some lube on top for added sensations. There’s a bit of risk involved with this method, though, as a middle-aged man once died after getting his penis caught in an artificial vagina (Sexplanations). It’s not likely to happen to you, but be careful just the same.
4. Glove Sucker
Using a medical exam glove might not look as pretty, but this method is quite effective and hygienic. Apparently, these types of glove are available at dollar stores in the US and Poundland perhaps in the UK. The key is to find one that is stretchy and big enough to hold your penis. Tuck it inside and secure with rubber bands on both ends. Then, slather it in lube and enjoy the self-lubricating male pleasure toy.
If you don’t want to use a glove, you can try a softer option with a towel and rubber glove. This is a common DIY method recommended by masturbation sites such as JackinWorld. Start by tying the pinky and thumb of a glove in knots, then turn it inside out leaving only three fingers hanging loose.
Place a textured or ribbed towel over the lubricated glove. Fold the towel over the glove and secure with a rubber band on each end of the towel. Add a few plastic beaded necklaces or bungee cords to the towel for extra texture.
While the above methods work, a real Fleshlight is much closer to the actual thing. Still, these DIY methods might help ease the transition for those who are a little uncomfortable with squishing their penis in their hands. Plus, a heated fuckable toy might amp up pleasure levels even more!
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